My dad prides himself on his punniness. He has been a punster since Hector was a Pup, and if you don't know who Hector is you have obviously not met my dad either. The all time great pun story though happened long ago and far away. I was 12 or 13 years old and for some reason was home alone with my dad. I'm pretty sure I was sick from school that day, but whatever was wrong with me didn't involve my appetite because I was starving at lunchtime. This was before the days of microwave ovens (yes, I am old, I told you it was long ago!) so kitchens were not so kid friendly and a child, even a teenage child didn't just skip into the kitchen to make lunch for themselves. I was begging my dad to feed me and all I was getting in return was stupid jokes.
Hungry Child: (imploring) Dad will you please make me a hotdog?
Punny Dad: *employing imaginary magic wand* Poof! You're a hotdog!
Hungry Child: Daaaaad! *sighs*
Hungry Child: (tries again) Dad, will you FIX me a hotdog?
Punny Dad: (without even looking up from the book on his lap) I didn't know they were broken!
Hungry Child: Dadddddy! *rolls eyes*
Hungry Child: (really getting desparate but also thinking she has this wordsmith licked) Daddy, will you please PREPARE me a hotdog?
My dad put his cigarette in the ashtray, set his beer on the side table, snapped his book shut, jumped up and ran to the kitchen. I thought FINALLY, I'm gonna get some lunch! Until I heard this...
Punny Dad: *opens the refrigerator door and shouts* LOOK OUT HOTDOGS, HERE SHE COMES!!!!!